Over the weekend i saw the age old debate of working mum vs stay at home mum raging on twitter. Of course its not a new debate but its still very emotive one. After reading Rach's post on the matter, i thought i would do my own from the perspective of a SAHM.
Becoming a SAHM was a choice for me, i chose to do it because i didn't want to leave Seb with someone else, i wanted to be there to see his first words, steps etc. It wasn't my original plan to stay at home but i changed my mind. I think alot of people feel its an easy option where you can sit on your bum and watch tv all day and i'm sure some mums do this day in and day out but i'm not one of them. The way i see it is i chose to stay at home and therefore i will give Seb a mixture of experiences be it from the mundane walk around Asda to venturing into the wild world of soft play, we also do lots of activities at home from painting to cornflour play. Everything we do together teaches my little sponge something and i get to see him learning these things and watch him change from a baby into a child in front of my very eyes.
Financially things can sometimes be tight. I am the girl who used to spend at least £100 on clothes and make up every weekend and the rest on going out but having a baby changed me, i still love clothes and make up but i only buy things i love instead of wasting my money on things i will never use. It is weird going from having your own earnings to not having them, of course it is, its a big change but so is having a baby! I feel i make a valuable contribution to our home by simply being there, raising Seb, making sure we have food, keeping everything clean and organised, preparing decent meals the list goes on.
Just as you have bad days at work, you have bad days at home where your little angel is paddying non stop and you have told them at least 100 times not to touch the wires as its dangerous, and then they throw your lovingly prepared food on the floor and poo in the bath, on these days you can't wait for bedtime so you can have a glass or two of wine just the same as you can't wait to escape work to do the same thing!
I will of course be going back to work once Seb and bump are older, using the qualifications that i worked hard to get but for now i am more then happy to stay at home.
Lets face it we are all different, I know other mums who would love to stay at home but can't, i also know others who love going back to work and feel it gives them time to be themselves again and have adult conversations rather then a slave to their child. If a child is being well looked after and it works for them then thats great. Its a shame that we all judge others on their choices, lets be honest we all do it to some extent(i certainly do), be it on this issue or another parenting issue but until we have walked in someone elses shoes we can't really say how they should live their life.